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Should We Or Should We Not? |
There is no
doubt that one of the roles of the Church of England is not
to be out of touch with society but keep one step behind.
Through the Bishops in the House of Lords and at General
Synod it is important that the church discusses and debates
major issues. Recently we have seen the great debate about
women Bishops and more recently about child benefit, but
this week 100 clergy from the Diocese of London have raised
the difficult issues of whether clergy should be allowed to
bless same sex relationships.
Some years ago
when I was vicar of Herne Bay in Kent, the then Bishop of
Dover asked me to see him because I was marrying couples
after divorce because I felt in my own conscience that it
was right to do so. I had every legal right to do so, but at
that stage the church had not given its permission. However,
many clergy were flouting these rules and simply doing what
their conscience told them and in certain circumstances to
marry those who had been divorced. The Bishop gave me his
advice (!) but I still went back to my church and married
those I felt should be married in church. Today the church
openly allows those who have been divorced to marry in
church and couples rarely ask the question, ‘Do you allow
those who have been divorced to remarry in church?’
When it comes to
homosexuality the church has been rather like the Babylonian
god Janus looking in both directions. Although it was in
1967 that homosexuality became legal in England and Wales it
took some time for the church to accept this, although there
were homosexuals, even Bishops in the church at that time -
I did live in London then! It was as if the church was
acting like some prudish Victorian minor aristocratic
housewife and ignoring everything going on within the grand
house and facing the world as if nothing was happening.
As a student in
London it was quite obvious that even before 1967 that
clergy were ordained who not only were homosexual but had
same sex relationships. The fact that it is a London Diocese
which is leading the way in hoping to allow sex
relationships to be blessed in church, is no surprise.
As I come to the
latter part of my ministry I do believe that eventually the
church will allow the blessing of same sex relationships but
probably not yet. In the meantime clergy will flout the
rules and follow their consciences and more and more of
these ceremonies will take place as they have already done
in parts of the country. Personally I feel immensely sorry
for those people who have found a long lasting loving
partner, who are regular members of church, who can’t be
blessed by their local Vicar. It can never be marriage as
far as I can see it, but it is and can be a very special and
holy relationship which I am sure that God blesses. To live
the underworld life of a homosexual seeking out friends
where you can is absolutely dangerous, and has led to many
deaths from Aids related illnesses. That same sex couples in
Roman Catholic dominated countries such as Italy, Spain and
France walk hand in hand down the street with pride, is
surely far better than doing it in private, so as to please
the state, or the church, or even their families.
So I would plead
for justice for those who were made in the wonderful way
they were, and for the many friends I have had over the
years who have been homosexual –some sadly have died of
Aids. I would say hold you head up high and thank God for
your creation. One day I will bless my first same sex couple
but only when I want to and only when I believe it is right.
I don’t want anyone to legally push or force me into doing
so.
May be there is
a little bit of Janus in all of us. God created us as we
are, and we simply can’t change that.
Adrian Bell
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